S P L E N D A.

Waiting in line for my morning beverage.
(Today I feel like drinking tea)
I count five people in front of me,
ordering some complicated sounding
caffinated beverages.

After 10 minutes, it's finally my turn.
The guy at the cash register
is a jittery mess.
(i.e. spazzing out like Steve Buscemi in Reservoir Dogs)

As I give him my order ( Refresh green tea),
he turns into an octopus.
One hand making my tea,
the other handing me my change,
and the rest, well, you don't want to know.

Before he hands me my tea
he says, "would you like some... (long pause)..., honey?
Sexual innuendos are not apreciated this early in the morning.
I politly said no, and walked quickly to the condiments bar.

As I reach for the fake sugar (because fantasy is always sweeter)
a man, which I assume has "sugar tourettes",
started saying "artifial sugar", "artificial sugar".
I'm guilty of liking artificial things.
Artificial is a synonim of the word fake.
I have dye in my hair, make-up on my face.
I like looking articial.
I blame Barbie.

As the man kept saying "articial sugar"over and over.
I stirred my drink and hurried out of there.
Before anyone realized I'm as fake as
the Splenda in my tea.